Saturday, March 7, 2009

The Family Stone

I called my mom today, just to check in. She's not much on calling me. So, I call her when I'm in the mood. Which ends up being like once a month. I should have known better. She always seems to say the wrong thing. I was telling her how big and healthy the boys are getting, and how I have 6 weeks to go, but can't imagine how big I'll be by then, and how I hope it comes a little sooner.

She proceeded to lecture me on how I need to keep them in there so they can be healthy, and I should just get a good book, prop my feet up, and relax.

Kinda sounds like the assvice she gave me when we were TTC. Yes, mother, relaxing solves everything.

I told her that my babies' combined weight was now bigger than any pregnancy she had ever experienced, and I had six more weeks to go, so that until she'd been in my shoes, she maybe shouldn't judge.

I mean, seriously, yes, of course, I want the boys in there as long as possible...is it too much to ask for a little empathy, a little I remember feeling that way or It will all be worth it. Anything but scolding.

Further solidified my resolve to NOT have her here when we first bring home the boys. She will only complicate an already stressful situation.

I'm also kind of getting sick of it at work. Everyone keeps telling me to enjoy the quiet, whenever I mention that I'm lonely with T at work and me at home so much. I wasn't complaining, I was just sharing, okay? You ask about how I'm doing, that's how I'm doing. And USUALLY I'm actually expressing gratitude that I could even BE in the office, so its not like I'm a whiner!

Ok, enough bitching. I would just much prefer empathy to their condascending, know it all b.s. So, I'm probably not going to vent anywhere but here and to DH anymore. I can't risk the letdown.

***
I cried about 10 times watching The Family Stone this afternoon. I don't want to give it away, if you haven't seen it, but Diane Keaton is the mom and there are these moments throughout the movie that she is an amazing mom and I was just really touched by how she handled some situations, not all, but some. And so, I cried.

2 comments:

Jess to the Lo said...

Hang in there. It can be very difficult when people judge and do not try to understand what you are feeling. I have had a rough time with that with my miscarriages recently.

Keep the venting here, it's a good spot for it.

sushilover said...

wow, your mom and my mom have a lot in common. My mother CONSTANTLY compares my pregnancy to her simple back in the day singleton pregnancies. If I hear, well I did it and you and your brother turned out okay one more time...or don't feel too bad if breast feeding doesn't work for you, I think I'll stick a pen in my eye.