Sunday, April 12, 2009

Birth Story

Starting this post on sunday evening, around 10:20pm. We'll see how far I get before the boys wake up or I fall asleep!

Friday morning, we left our house around 7:15 and headed to the hospital. We got checked in, and the nurse started trying to monitor the boys. She couldn't tell for sure that the second heartbeat wasn't the first, and had called for a sonogram when it was time to go to surgery. I was not worried, Baby B had been difficult to find all along, so I didn't let that freak me out.

Once in the surgical room, I had the shakes because it was cold in there, plus my IV bag was cold. I was a little afraid of shaking too much for the epidural, but the anesthesiologist was great. He predicted every sensation and it was truly over right away.

Once that was in, they made me lay on what other women have told you and I am here to confirm - is the smallest table in the world! The prep work continued. My surgery was scheduled for 9:30 and my OB showed up at 9:55. There was some waiting around until he got there, but I was so happy to see his face when he peaked in to mark up my belly, I didn't care.

The boys were out soon enough. I felt the pulling that everyone tells you about, but it was the weirdest sensation ever when they pulled Jack out, I actually felt my right side of my belly deflate. Their cries seemed water-logged at first, like they were crying under water, but they were strong cries and they scored 8,9 and 9.9 on their apgars. Wahoo!

Stitching me up took forever. And I lost more blood than they would have liked. The procedure was pretty simple. Only side effect was that I was itchy everyone, but especially under my pressure cuff. So, I enlisted DH to scratch that for me from time to time.

Jack was born at 10:07am, weighing 7lbs 11oz. Will came next at 10:09am, weighing 6lbs, 6oz. There was some confusion over Baby A vs. Baby B for some time, because they were in reverse order during all the previous sonograms. So, anytime someone has a question, I let DH tell them which is A and which is B. I'm getting better, but I still have to think it through.

We were in recovery from 11am until about 5:30pm. It shouldn't have been that long, but I had lost a lot of blood, and was continuing to bleed more than they wanted, so they wanted to monitor me more closely. They gave me some drug that is intended to make the uterus 'clamp down' and that seemed to make all the difference in the world.

I was able to tandem feed the boys (with the help of one nurse on each breast!) in the recovery room. I tried to make a few calls, but left the majority of those to DH. They were checking the boys quite often, so I didn't see much of them, but I could see them and hear them and I knew they were okay.

We had a lot of guests Friday night, but I was feeling up to it. Seemed like the weight of the world lifted off of me when we got to "our" room, not just some holding area. The boys fussed until about 3am when I finally asked DH to put them both in bed with me and to let him get some sleep. They didn't wake up until the nurses woke me up and I tried to feed them.

Saturday was a freaking zoo in here - hospital staff including pediatrician, audiologist, camera dude, cleaning people, nurse and nurse, resident, my OB, plus family and friends. I probably was up too much during the day, because last night I became ill. I had the worst stomach cramps from gas that alternated between stabbing pains and vomiting. I was so disappointed about that, because I had gone the entire pregnancy without puking. DH had rested the night before, so he got to be in charge of the boys while I was ill.

Finally, around 5:30 this morning, I just knew I was better. So, I let the nurse bring me my pain pills and give me my shot - two things I had asked to skip until I knew I wouldn't just puke up the Percocet.
I was able to walk back/forth to the bathroom all day, and even took a shower all by myself. I haven't dared to look at the incision, but trust then the nurses tell me how great it looks. I'm pretty sure we'll go home tomorrow. I'll miss the constant catering of these nurses, who have been so good to us, and I'll miss the hospital bed, but I won't miss being pestered for my blood pressure, a blood sample, etc. or watching the boys get their vital signs taken which causes great consternation on their part.
The boys are amazing! They are so healthy and so adorable. I still can't believe that I grew them in my belly. I'm enjoying getting to know them, observing their facial expressions, and learning about their different cries. I could watch them all day, but my nausea medication makes me fall asleep. Breastfeeding puts me to sleep, as well.
My husband's family have been the biggest baby hogs ever. They don't put them down and they come to visit for 5 hours at a time. They also don't share with other guests. It's getting really, really old and it has only been about 3 days.
I seriously feel like I have missed a lot of time with my boys, because I want to be a gracious host. I know that no one is here in the hospital to see me!
Anyway, after my night o puking, we wanted our guests staggered, and my inlaws called to say they were on their way. When DH called back to suggest they wait until 3 so another visitor would have their own time, his step father replied with the old "so you're keeping us from the boys' lives" Are you freaking kidding me?! My husband was so upset about it, when they did arrive we had to discuss this. Not that they even listened, because obviously they're not rational. But we tried. A one hour delay does not a life take away. And its totally unfounded. I took my MIL to a sonogram appointment. I constantly sent her emails of sono pics for the appointments she didn't attend. I didn't have to do that. I went above and beyond to include her because I knew she was so excited to be a grandmother. So, lest I sound like a total meanie for wanting the boys to myself here and there, I just wanted to remind everyone that I am indeed a good DIL. They are just completely unrealistic freaks.
They want to come to the house every day once we get home and stay for hours, as well. That's totally not happening, but I just bit my tongue. Sometimes avoidance is the best tactic I have for dealing with these issues. I just won't answer the door if they won't listen to reason. I'm desperate for some alone time with my husband and our sons. I don't want to hurt DH's family, but they have to have their own kids if they want those kinds of visitation rights. I think one hour is plenty. And actually, if it happens everyday, one hour is probably more than I want.
We shall see how my husband handles this task. I told them never to pull the 'babies out of our life' card again. There will be a big blowup if they do. Wish me luck to handle this the right way for our family. I just don't get where people come up with these expectations that we're going to have these children that we have wanted for so long, and then leave them all the time, or never want alone time. We are both only children, we are both independent, and we want to figure this out. I will never get to know my sons if I allow my MIL to hold them all day, every day. So, anyway, I'm just rambling now, but you get the idea. Family drama. Grrrrrr.
I'm sure I've left out a billion important details, but I've hit the highlights. My husband has been super. He's changed every diaper, swaddled after every change and feed. He loves these boys so much, and is going to be the best father ever! I am so proud of how we've handled the crying, and tried things together. It truly is going to be a great adventure for us both. And I'm so excited to raise these boys with him.
Holy crap! I'm a mom!


Sushilover said...

OMG! How could I have missed this! I know...I've been taking care of the nuggets! Congrats to you for carrying (and working up to the last minute) your adorable little boys! I can totally relate to your situation with the zoo like conditions in the hospital. I had to stay for 4 days and I couldn't wait to get out of there towards the end. There was an interruption every minute it seemed like and that was with us limiting guest visits. You crack me up about the make up job because I did the same thing. But boy do you look so much better in your pre-op pics than I do...I was in so much discomfort that I could barely muster a grimace. And I had the same situation with them trying to find a baby..only it was baby A. I couldn't wait to get them out! Congrats again...look forward to seeing more pics!

JamieD said...

Holy crap! You're a mom!!

I am so, so happy for you. Though I am sad about the in-law drama. But what's life without drama? We are anticipating our own in-law drama when our baby gets here.

You have every right to stand up for your boys and your family. Lay down the rules now because it will just get harder and harder.


G$ said...

I am so glad to hear you and the boys are doing so well, minus the puking and extra bleeding on your part.

I hope you and your DH can have a united front towards visitation. You as a family need time to bond when you get home. Maybe you can flush out more crap before you get home. I can't believe they pulled that card within the first 48 hours! Stay strong lady, you will make it work.

So happy for you! Can't wait to see more pix!

Jess to the Lo said...

I am so glad to hear that things went almost unhitched for you! (Sorry to hear about the extra bleeding though.) I hope the In Law situation works out well, with minimal fighting for you all.

I am so happy to hear that your boys are doing so well. It's such a blessing! Congrats!

g said...

Congrats!!!!!!!!!!! glad all went well and the boys are good!! sorry for the family drama... i feel that will be a part of our BS too! i hope your having a speedy recovery!! Enjoy your boys!!! :)

Somewhat Ordinary said...

CONGRATULATIONS!!! The boys are adorable and you look fantastic!

Oh, and are your IL's related to my IL's? Mine act the EXACT same way. My son is 1 and they still pull shit like this (actually it has gotten worse as he has gotten older). I have no advice because we've laid down rules and they just bitch and moan about them. The new one was my MIL actually crying to me because she doesn't think it is fair that she is "scheduled" into his life and has to see him around our schedule. Wow, so is she saying she wants to live with us so she can see him all the time? I feel for you because I've been there and I'm just hoping my BIL has a kid soon so we're off the hook a little.
I will you and your husband need to set boundaries early on so they don't get accustomed to certain things.

Again, congrats, I didn't mean to hog your comments!

Anonymous said...

I'm so very happy for you!!!!

Sorry that everything wasn't 100% smooth but look what you have to show for it!

As for the have to band together and grit your teeth and just take a stand. I know that you shouldn't have to but....

Ah families! :-)

Amanda said...

Congratulations on being a new mother! I'm glad that both boys are doing so well and that you're on the road to recovery. Holy cow you had some big boys! Your little guy was only an ounce smaller than my "big boy". Way to grow 'em!

Good luck with the in-law issues. I wish I had some advice for you, but I don't. Luckily my in-laws live across the state.

Good luck!