It was nice to see him, and his nurse. He diagnosed me with a viral infection (common flu). Treating with 36 ounces Gatorade, a prescription to combat the trots, and ... unfortunately ... back to bland foods. The RX is working already, which is wonderful. And I've kept down all my food plus the Gatorade. So, life is good.
It turns out good that I could see him, so we could discuss how he will manage my thyroid replacement until I see the endocrinologist in October. We worked out a plan for labs on the weekend, and appointment with him on Tuesday evening which should help me avoid missing too much work.
Did I mention that he's totally hot? And the first thing he said when he came in the exam room was he liked my hair? Yes, cursed with another great hair day during isolation. I got bored and straightened it yesterday. At least SOMEBODY got to see it.
I also got a TSH test, which will be my measurement of how my thyroid is being suppressed and replaced now for life. I need it to be .1 to .2 and after two days on the hormone, it is still at a 70. Which may explain why I'm still gaining weight even though everything I eat goes straight through or comes back up.
I had been feeling guilty about how little work is actually being accomplished in this house this week. My focus is improving, but I am still not as productive as I would like to be. But I remembered how much I worked during maternity leave. Probably 1-2 hours every day. So, given 6 weeks of leave, at 10 hours a week, then I probably had accrued about 60 hours of comp time anyway. Being back in the office next week will definitely get me back on track. At least I hope.
Yesterday was a really weepy day. I am blaming the thyroid hormone. After DH left with the boys for daycare yesterday, I was struck by this image of him raising them without me. Just typing it makes me tear up again. Anyway, I was hyperventilating, all out bawling in the shower with fear. I'm strong. And most days I'm rational. But when I open myself up to the emotional reality of a cancer diagnosis, I'm scared. I don't want to die.